Keeping It Real

Parenthood, and life in general, can be exhausting, but keeping things in perspective certainly helps.

Sometimes my kids (especially my middle child) talk my ear off.  It can be enough to drive a person crazy when all you want is to not hear any voices for a few minutes.  But then I think about parents who's children don't or can't talk at all.  Those parents would give their left arm to hear their child start speaking and I'm complaining because mine talk too much.

When we are going through a vicious cycle of illness and I hear myself complaining about how someone's been throwing up for 2 days and I have to close down daycare while they recover, I think about the parents who've got it worse.  Parents who's child is going through chronic illness or cancer and miss weeks or months of work while they pray their child will survive.  It makes cleaning up vomity sheets seem like not such a bad deal.

When I find myself whining about an itchy case of eczema I think about my dad being hooked up to a colostomy bag, dealing with gout, while fighting cancer at the same time.  And I never heard him complain once.

When I'm feeling pulled in a million directions because I am over-run with children, I remember when we only had one and all the tears we shed trying to have a second little one.  And I think of the would-be parents who have struggled for years to have a child and how much they long for a child to need them.

On a similar note, when I'm rundown because the kids only want me so often, I'll think down the line when they are teenagers and just want to be independent and how I'll be their annoying mom.  I'll look back when they are 14 to when they were little and wanted me all the time and I'll wish I could go back to having tiny little arms around my leg.

When I'm stressed about money or feeling broke, I need to just be thankful that we have a roof over our head and food on the table.

And finally, when life gets to be too much and I want to run away, I'll remember to count my blessings and be thankful for what I have.

Preschool Graduation Cap Tutorial

Izzy graduated from preschool, and that meant a pretty summer dress, cupcakes, a diploma, and of course a graduation cap!

I have made them before, but this time I did it better, thanks to a link on Pinterest and some tweeking!  Here's the link to the directions I went off of, but I wanted to show you how I did it in case you find yourself needing to make graduating caps for little ones.

Here's my little preschool graduate in her cap

 I bought black tagboard, and following the instructions I cut the following pieces: 1 10x10inch, 1 2x4, and 1 4x22.  Unless you know your graduate has a small head, you may want to make the long one longer than 22 inches so you can make the band bigger if needed.

 Measure around the child's head, leave some overlap, and trim if needed.  Fold along the length of the band a flap about one inch wide, and cut 8-10 triangle notches.

Take yarn, or whatever you want to use for your tassel, and cut strips 36 in, 24 in, and 4 in.  Don't worry if your measurements aren't exact, it wont matter.

 Wrap the 36 inch piece around the small rectangle, this will become the tassel part.

 Use the 24 inch piece to loop through the top of the tassel and tie a knot.

 Then just cut the bottom of the tassel loops (that are wrapped around the little rectangle) and trim to make them even lengths

 Use the 4 inch piece of yarn to wrap around the tassel about 3/4 inch down, tie a knot, and cut off the ends if they don't lie down nicely with the rest of the tassel.

 Pop a hole in the middle of the square with a scissors or whatever you have handy.

 I had to use some spit to get the ends of the tassel to stay together enough to get into that tiny hole in the hat.  Some type of threader would be recommended if you think you're about to chuck it across the room in frustration.  Don't chuck it!  I did it, you can too!  Then put a piece of tape over the underside of the hole to secure the tassel.

 Fold the band around, measured to fit your child's head, and staple closed.  I only did the 8 notches that the directions called for, I think it would have been nicer if I added a couple more.  Put glue on the rim of the band...

And glue the band onto the square top!  Let dry, and you're done!

Connor: The Good Stuff

I've been complaining a lot about Connor lately, on Facebook and in my last blog post.  When I realized that too much negatives were coming out of my mouth and onto the computer screen, I wanted to write up a quick post describing some of the good things about Connor these days.  Because I love him, and he's not that little hellion I may have been making you think he is.

He is generous with compliments.  He regularly tells me and other people that he "loves" various things about them.  He tells me things like, "I love your shoes!" or "I love your eyes" or even "I love your ears".  Makes me smile! :o)

When we have living room picnics for dinner we always sit on a sheet to protect the carpet.  When we had quesadillas I was going to let the kids just sit on the carpet (not much risk of spills), but Connor insisted on a sheet.  "We need a blanket!" he told us.  A toddler's need for consistency can be a beautiful thing some times!

He likes to jump over things lately, especially bumps or cracks.  Big jumps!

He held hands with Izzy in their theater seats when we all went to see The Avengers on the big screen.

He wants to hug and kiss pretty much everyone.

When he smiles, it lights up my world.

He's my baby boy, and there is no one else quite like him.

I Might Just Move Out

I'm having kind of a bad day.

It's one of those days where I feel like I'm failing at life, which I realize is ridiculous because I can name off plenty of things I'm doing right, but I'm having a moment of self-pity I suppose.

I feel like I'm not living up to anyone's expectations, particularly my own expectations.  I'm feeling helpless, clueless, and as a result - a little hopeless.  I'm sure that in reality this isn't true, but the feelings are there from time to time and it makes me want to bury my head in the sand until I'm magically feeling better about it all.

Thing is, if I'm waiting for a magical cure-all, I'm going to be waiting a LONG time, so I should really just take care of things myself.

High up on my list is parenting Connor.  He is really well behaved for the most part when I am not around, which honestly makes me want to just move out from time to time, but when we're together he's all whining and naughtiness.  Mikayla had temper tantrums, Izzy hasn't always been a gem either, and perhaps it's because I'm just stretched thinner as a mother of 3 than I was before, but I'm pretty sure Connor secretly wants me to move out.  Ugh.

A week and a half ago during the Wizard of Oz cast/crew potluck, Spencer and Connor were eating their food while I was getting myself ready to go to a call-back for another play.  As soon as I sat back down with them Connor starting whining/complaining about his food and wanting to get down and being just plain ugly about it.  Spencer says, "he was fine until you got here."  Double UGH!

We've made some progress though.  I pulled out my good ol' behavior chart and added a reward at the end of the day for everyone age 3 and up who get's to the star at the end of the chart.  They get a hershey kiss if they get all the way there (every hour or so of good behavior gets them a step toward their star, bad behavior moves them back).  I give my daycare boy's treat to his mom for her to give him when she deems it appropriate, Connor and Izzy get theirs as soon as daycare is over (Mikayla too actually, but she doesn't need the chart).  Out of sheer desperation for not wanting to put Connor on craigslist, I also bought a cheap 5-pack of matchbox cars.  Until the cars are gone, if he is really good all day he can have one at the end of the day.  I don't think it's appropriate to keep that kind of reward going, but for the 5 times he gets one it will hopefully drive the point home that good behavior is rewarded while bad behavior gets nothing but punishment.

He's also spending more time in time out, which he hates, and he didn't like how mad I got at him yesterday when he was being particularly horrendous.  I know he's a three-year-old and it's a totally different kind of difficult than age 2 is, but sheesh!

Also, until I can get him to behave himself around me, the potty training thing just won't go well, because he doesn't seem at all apt to please me.

I'm sure I'll pull out of this funk eventually, I'm just hoping that it's sooner rather than later.

Thanks for listening!!

Lights OUT

Connor's new thing has been turning on his light, since he can now reach it without standing on anything, when he's supposed to be sleeping.

On and off it goes during nap time, which doesn't bother me much, and at night, which bothers me more.  A few nights ago it was a real problem.  He turned it on, and instead of playing the on/off game with him all night I just let him keep it on and when he fell asleep I turned it off for him and went to bed.  When I woke up to use the bathroom 5 hours later his light was back on and he was asleep again.  I turned it off and went back to bed.  When I woke up in the morning it was on again.  Clearly he wasn't getting much sleep if he was turning his light on constantly - which made him horrendously crabby the next day!

He has a night light, and I don't think at this point that it's a fear of the dark thing... I think it's more of a Connor's-being-a-booger thing.  After a Monday from hell with him, Spence and I agreed that since he can't keep his light off when he's supposed to, he will lose his lights for a while.  So I loosened his light bulbs so no matter how many times he flicks the light switch, he will get no reward.

Monday night he got a bit more sleep and was considerably less possessed-like on Tuesday.  Tuesday night he fell right asleep and got a good 12 hours of sleep.  And the verdict?  He was still just as cranky as ever this morning.  Maybe he needs more than just one good night sleep to cure him of his nastiness, we can only hope.

He wasn't happy about his "broken" lights, but I told him since he was being naughty and turning his lights on at bedtime, we took away his lights.  He doesn't like it but he doesn't seem scared of the darkness, and I know that our solution is far more to his liking then returning him to the hospital.  Plus they won't take him back... I asked.

We're Off to See the Wizard!!

Last weekend was opening weekend of The Wizard of Oz which both my girls were in!  Mikayla plays the roles of Crow, Poppy, and a Candy Shop Girl in Oz; and Izzy plays Toto during the Kansas scenes.

Mikayla continues to show no fear on stage, while Izzy has been riddled with anxiety since the beginning, but both girls are doing an awesome job!  The hours have been long, not getting home and in bed until about 11:00 this past week (which explains why at 10:30 on a non-play night they are both in their beds still awake and reciting lines from the play) but it has been worth it!  

The entire show has surpased my expectations, and those of most of our audience members.  We have sold out two of our 4 shows so far before even opening the doors, and are looking forward to another busy weekend of performances.  I'm not going to go into it too much tonight, but wanted to show you a few pictures for those of you haven't seen them on facebook already (my facebook friends are getting tired of hearing about the Wizard of Oz by now I'm sure)

Mikayla in stage makeup before dress rehearsal.  Mikayla loves being in plays and has no stage fear.  I wish I was more like that!  She is enthusiastic and a pretty awesome singer!

Izzy as Toto holding the Toto that sits with the narrator Dorothy.  Lots of things throughout the process of rehearsals and performances have worried Izzy to tears, and the late nights have made her pretty tired, but she is having a lot of fun making new friends and playing in the dressing rooms with the other kids.  She is such a cute Toto and gets lots of laughs and "Awww"s from the audience!  She is having fun and once she gets past each of the little details that worries her she enjoys herself quite a bit!

We have 6 Dorothys, 2 Totos, 2 Wicked witches, 2 Glindas, and some double-casted munchkins as well.  Partly to accommodate a very large cast of 115 kids!

Toto scoping out Professor Marvel's roasting marshmallow.

Mikayla in her crow costume for the scene where Dorothy meets the Scarecrow.  She likes being a crow, they get to sing and dance with the Scarecrow and tease him throughout the scene.

So you put makeup on her and she becomes a 13 year old?

Opening night was one of their sold out shows, and was a huge success!  

We are so proud of our kids!

If you are interested in coming to see the show, you should order online before it sells out! youththeatreworkshop.org

The Day I Killed Santa

What do Santa, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy have in common?

Less than a week ago, they all died.

At least to Mikayla they did.  A couple years ago Mikayla asked me, "Mom, are you the tooth fairy?" and since she was almost eight years old I gave it to her straight.  "Yes, I am."  and she instantly felt part of a big secret.  But she didn't ask about any of the others, and we had planned on waiting until she asked before we told her the real deal about Santa and the Easter Bunny... but she didn't ask.  Ever.

I even tried to coax it out of her last fall, knowing that Christmas would be coming up.  Asking her leading questions about if she had any questions or wanted to talk about the fact that the Tooth Fairy isn't real.  She didn't bite.

As we neared Easter we decided we'd wait until after Easter and tell her the truth, not wanting to break it to her  2 days before the holiday.  It had gotten to the point where we worried she'd start getting teased about it at school, but she takes being lied to really hard.  One of her close friends lied to her at school a few months ago and she came home sobbing like someone had chopped off her foot.  Needless to say I was a little nervous about telling her that it had all been a "lie".

The first chance we got after Easter was Monday evening on the way to Wizard of Oz rehearsal (both the girls are in the Wizard of Oz which opens in less than 2 weeks!) when it was just Mikayla in the car.

Me: Do you remember when I told you about how the Tooth Fairy isn't real and that it's really me and dad?
Mikayla: yeah?
Me: You know Santa and the Easter Bunny?
Mikayla: Are you saying they're not real too? (looking shocked and bummed)
Me: me and Dad are Santa and the Easter Bunny.
Mikayla: Does that mean nothing is real?
Me: like what things do you mean?
Mikayla: (a little bit frantic) So Leprechauns aren't real!!?
Me: (stifling a giggle) No leprechauns are not real.  These things are just fun to imagine and think about.  They're all just magical make-believe fun for kids.

She took it pretty well.  I told her that now that she was in on the secret she needed to keep the secret, and not tell anyone and ruin the fun for them.  She said it would be easy to not tell the little kids but she'd have a hard time keeping it to herself with her friends... and we were 3 minutes away from play rehearsal where there are over 100 kids of all ages.

As we pull in to the parking lot she's got her hand on her mouth saying, "Oh I'm going to tell someone! I'm going to tell someone!"  Luckily she didn't.  And since getting through that first time around friends I think she has it under control.  I'm just happy she wasn't furious with us for "lying" to her all these years, but she understood that it was for fun.

But now, as far as my oldest child goes, Santa and the Easter Bunny are gone.  But she'll still get all the goodies!  :o)