Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Our story of Grief and Joy - Part 4

If you haven't been following along before now, click here to start with Part 1. 




After losing two babies and having no answers as to what had happened, we were told we should wait at least 1 whole cycle before trying again.  This was tough because we were worried after trying to have a second child for over a year that it would never happen for us.  It had taken us almost a year to get pregnant the last time and I didn't want to wait any longer.  In the end we waited one full cycle before trying again... 2 months was just out of the question at this point.  I set up an appointment with my OB to go over a plan for how we would monitor the next pregnancy, and what could be done to help it along.

August 3, 2005   wednesday

We waited one cycle and now I'm on cycle day 12 of our 2nd month.  I had an appointment with Dr. Keller today to talk about fertility and sustaining the next pregnancy.  She gave me a prescription for progesterone which I take twice a day from ovulation through the first trimester (or until I get my period if I don't get pregnant).  They also did a lot of blood work - they took 8 vials of blood for the tests - which wont come back for a couple weeks.  I've been taking my temperatures each morning which have stayed fairly even, so it should be easy to tell when I have ovulated.  I'm also doing my ovulation predictor tests the same way every morning right when I wake up. 
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August 15, 2005   monday

I got my blood work results back on thursday and there was definitely something there.  It showed that I most likely have Antiphospholipid Syndrom, which is a blood clotting disorder I think.  One main symptom is repeated loss of pregnancies.  So this is the reason for my miscarriages.  When we get pregnant again I will need to see a high-risk OB, and be monitored more closely.  I am already taking one baby asprin per day and I will most likely be doing that for the rest of my life.

This is a very rare disorder and Dr. Keller said that most doctors don't know much about it.  I feel very relieved that we figured this out so that our next baby can have a better chance.
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September 28, 2005   wednesday

A second blood test showed that I don't have the disorder they previously thought, but I'm thinking of getting a third test and go 2 out of 3.
I found out later that the reason the first test was positive, was because it was supposed to be done after fasting for 12 hours or something, but I had eaten meals that day because no one had told me not to! Nice huh??

We found out I'm pregnant just this past Saturday (9/24/05) but already it's not looking good.  I started spotting on Monday morning.  I went in for an hcg test yesterday evening and they called me today saying it was 81, which she said is low for how far I am.  I'll go back thursday evening for more blood work and will get the results of that back friday.  My lower back, all the way around to the sides of my abdomen are achy, but that could just be my body stretching. 

If we lose this baby, I don't know how I'll make it through starting another pregnancy.
*                   *                       *                         *

September 30, 2005   friday

The nurse was wonderful enough to call me back right away this morning before 9:00!  Usually I wait and pace until I eventually call them to find out my results.  My hcg numbers went from 81 to 144.  It isn't doubled but it's close.  She seemed very optimistic and said it's a good number, even though it's not the 160 we were hoping for - she said it's still good.  I'm not so sure.  This spotting seems so much like last time when we lost the baby.
*                   *                  *                      *

October 9, 2005   sunday

I am waiting - patiently I might add - for my newest hcg levels.  Last week, tuesday I was very sick with some flu-like virus but stopped spotting for 3 days!  Thursday night I had some pink blood, but haven't been spotting since.  I had blood work done friday morning and this morning.  Hopefully I will get results soon tomorrow.  Then I have an ultrasound on tuesday.  I'm not sure what it will show though since I ovulated on day 19 or 20 instead of day 14 like  you're "supposed to". 

This period of time was so filled with hcg numbers, and waiting for phone calls, and checking for blood, and getting blood drawn (it's a good thing I'm not squeamish about blood!) and worrying, and more and more worrying. 

Can I just say that waiting for your hcg levels is a killer.  It's awful knowing that there are answers to some of your questions just sitting on someone's computer somewhere, and you have to wait for someone to call you to let you know how your pregnancy is doing.

Click here to find out the results and what happened next. 

Have any of you ever been through this experience?  It sucks... big time doesn't it.
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